Naruto: 20 Grains Of Sand
by Tiger5913
Summary: 20 facts about Gaara that he tried to keep under wraps... come see what our favorite sand wielder has been hiding about himself all this time. ! Gaara centric, based on the 20 truths style !


3/11/08

Disclaimer: the characters in this fic such as Gaara, Kankuro, Temari, etc. don't belong to me, although if they did, then they would probably bicker with each other a lot for maximum hilarity, hehehe.

Dedication: God, my parents, my fans, Masashi Kishimoto for creating the Naruto series and giving us these colorful characters, and especially to my beloved friends, especially VGuyver, Andrew Glasco, Musashi Sanada, Francisco, Ariescelestial, and all of you other wonderful readers!!

Special dedication to: my friend Caitlin, who is one of the biggest Gaara fans I know; this is a big thank-you for all the meaningful discussions and laughs of mutual mocking that we've shared together.

**Naruto: 20 Grains Of Sand**

**(20 Truths About Gaara)**

**By Tiger5913**

Theme #1 – Family

At six years old, Gaara is sent to live with his siblings for the first time. He looks at them like they are strangers, and doesn't understand the bond they're supposed to share with each other.

Why should he be concerned that Temari is his big sister and Kankuro is his older brother? Their existences hardly have any relevance to his own life, so he just keeps to himself most of the time, leaving the house with a strange ache dwelling deep inside.

Getting attached to the two will only make him weak, and Gaara refuses to let that happen.

Theme #2 – Blood

The demon vessel needs a reason to live, and when he kills for the first time, he feels the sand quivering slightly as it returns to him, almost as if pleased with having come into contact with the crimson vitality of life… The pressure in Gaara's head eases up, and he is left in relief for a brief period… until the voice lingering at the back of his mind demands more of the same deep red sustenance.

He believes that having their blood slathered all over his sand will please the entity that protects him… his mother. So he obeys.

Theme #3 – Death

As a shinobi, he is not a stranger to death, but before his visit to the Leaf Village, he had never even come close to being defeated. His clothes remain clean and unruffled throughout the first two stages of the Chunin exam, and the so-called challenges are far too boring for his tastes. Killing the group of Rain shinobi was not enough to satisfy his bloodlust; Gaara wants more, but Temari's voice cuts through his muddled mind at the last second. He shouldn't waste his time.

If he wants to validate his existence, then he needs to slay strong opponents.

Theme #4 – Naruto

Truly, at their first meeting, the blond loudmouth doesn't even register as a tiny blip on his radar, because Gaara knows he would be wasting his time with such a pitifully feeble opponent.

It isn't until the hyperactive ninja has defeated the boy partnered with a dog that Gaara acknowledges him, especially when the two exchange a look as Naruto runs by to check on the condition of the green-clad taijutsu user. Gaara focuses his attention on his upcoming battle with the Uchiha.

Little does he know that the annoying little misfit will be the first person to defeat him.

Theme #5 – Lee

A voice inside his head is urging the sand wielder to finish what he started, and that drives him to the hospital, where he enters the room of his former battle opponent with a maddening desire to kill the sleeping figure on the bed. He doesn't even stop to think why he is doing this; the bloodlust has risen too high for his brain to maintain coherent logic and reason, not that he is even very familiar with those two attributes.

All Gaara knows is that a fight has to end with at least one dead person - more if necessary…

Theme #6 – Sasuke

It is practically instant hate at first sight for both of them.

In the Uchiha's hell-black eyes, Gaara sees nothing but resentment and bleak darkness. And like him, Sasuke seeks vengeance against some entity or force in life, and he will surely strive toward that goal, no matter what means he must go through to attain it. But until he is strong enough to face his adversary, his fear of death makes him weak and doomed to fail.

Sensing his hesitation, Gaara provokes him for the sole purpose of pushing the Uchiha to his limits, testing their wills to live.

Theme #7 – Kankuro

Growing up, Gaara has always sensed disapproval emanating from the tall puppeteer when they glare at each other in silence. Kankuro constantly mutters under his breath about how much he hates little brats, and Gaara contemplates taking that problem away by ridding the older boy of his existence. If he were dead, then he would no longer have any complaints to spew forth. But he sees some use in having Kankuro around.

So they barely tolerate the other's presence for many years.

Neither one of them has any idea that in the near future, the two will become close confidants.

Theme #8 – Temari

Despite being their big sister, Temari acts more like a mother figure to both him and his older brother. Her caring and nurturing behavior makes Gaara wonder if this is how his own mother would act around him, if she had been alive today.

Should he believe what Yashamaru said, he would have to think that his mother hates him, and wouldn't spare an ounce of love.

His elder siblings had at least gotten the chance to interact with their mother, even if for a short time, while Gaara could only look at pictures and recall naught a single thing.

Theme #9 – Changes

He wants to change his perspective and purposes in life, but soon discovers that it is a lot easier said than done. Apologizing to his siblings is just the first step – they forgive him without hesitation, which admittedly surprises him – and then the sand wielder thinks about what he should do next.

Upon hearing of the Leaf Village being in distress over the unexpected disappearance of a familiar raven-haired shinobi, Gaara volunteers to go on the mission to assist them.

Despite his dislike of the Uchiha, he owes a great debt to a certain blond ninja… so he will help.

Theme #10 – Yashamaru

As he is standing on the cliff side looking over Suna, and talking to his older brother about change, Gaara suddenly realizes that not once has he ever visited his maternal uncle's grave.

He was six when Yashamaru shattered his world. The sand wielder is 13 now, and even after all these years, he still feels a faint sensation of anger prickling at his nerves with the smallest reminder of his deceased uncle. But it makes Gaara all the more determined to prove _him_ wrong – he is no longer a monster.

He will attain acceptance from the other Suna villagers.

Theme #11 – Teddy Bear

A few months have passed since the Fourth Kazekage has died, and it's then that Gaara begins to wonder why he still keeps the raggedy old teddy bear from his childhood. It's the only thing that distinctly reminds him of his father, and that is the last person he wants to remember… or so he tries to convince himself. Seeing the teddy bear brings back past memories of a time when Gaara was young and gullible enough to believe that his father loved him.

Maybe he isn't quite ready to relinquish that illusion just yet… even though he wants to.

Theme #12 – Matsuri

Gaara's initial assessment is that this timid girl will not get far at all. She's incapable of being a shinobi with such a benevolent and docile attitude.

But to his surprise, she is very hard working and picks up his lessons quickly.

One year after they began their training, he looks on in awe at the knowledge that she has passed the Chunin exams.

He almost feels jealous of her unexpected talent, but he is her teacher first and foremost, so he instead gazes upon Matsuri with pride when he attends the ceremony that awards her the Chunin level status.

Theme #13 – Shukaku

The devious sand spirit torments him far more than he lets on. During a full moon, when Shukaku has an easier time taking control, he enjoys terrorizing people and toying with them before striking the killing blow. Gaara lets him do this because he could care less about the agony they are feeling, staying indifferent as he sees their contorted faces clearly displaying signs of suffering.

But now that he wants to change, Shukaku is resilient and struggles hard for dominance. The demon hates losing influence over his host; however, Gaara's will is strong, and successfully suppresses the evil presence.

Theme #14 – Friendship

When he is young, the sand wielder tries to befriend the other kids, but they always run away from him in fear. After a while, he decides to give up his efforts, especially upon finding out that his closest bond has been nothing but a lie all along.

And now, at 13, Gaara has somehow made a number of new acquaintances without even trying that hard. Surprising indeed.

His first friend is Naruto, while the second one is Lee, and he even has an actual friend from his own village of Suna, Matsuri.

He would protect them with his powers.

Theme #15 – Kazekage

Gaara is 14 when he becomes the Kazekage of Suna, making history as the youngest Kazekage in the Sand Village. Some of the dubious villagers speculate that he only attained the title because his father was the previous Kazekage. They don't trust him because they still fear the sand spirit in his body; they believe that one day, he will attack everyone while they're asleep to exact the ultimate revenge.

One year later, when the entire village is watching their Kazekage defending Suna from the robed stranger in the skies, the presumptuous people finally realize the error of their judgment.

Theme #16 – Learning

He can shake other people's hands and plaster a small smile on his face when he needs to, but truthfully, the young Kazekage still doesn't understand the rituals of social interaction.

That is his toughest lesson to learn, and although his siblings try to help by urging him to participate in some activities with their friends, he feels uncomfortable being around strangers. Only around Matsuri can he be himself, but unfortunately, he doesn't spend as much time with her as he would like.

Presently, Gaara allows a small sigh to escape his lips as he prepares himself for another performance.

Theme #17 – Sleeping

Presented with the option of being able to sleep for the first time in 15 years, Gaara is unsure of how to go about the process.

Surrounded by darkness, the young redhead idly remains in bed and stares up at the ceiling for some time while he silently wonders when he is supposed to enter the subconscious realm. Then he realizes that his eyes have to be closed in order to sleep, so his twin lids slide down dutifully. When his mind stops whirling with thoughts, he begins to drift off, and his body is relieved to attain true rest.

Theme #18 – Elder Chiyo

Though he doesn't show it, Gaara often thinks about the elderly woman that saved his life at the cost of her own. He makes time to visit her grave every week, even going at night if he has too many tasks and responsibilities to complete during the day. His pale turquoise eyes read the inscription engraved upon the hard gray stone several times over, but he never says a word.

He can't find a way to express the depth of his gratitude for what she did, and he hopes that his actions will suffice.

He will always remember Elder Chiyo.

Theme #19 – Recovery

The extraction of Shukaku from his body has caused Gaara to lose some affinity with the sand, but he still has control over it. Just six months after his death and subsequent revival, he regains most of his abilities through hard, diligent work with focused concentration and long hours of training.

His siblings and Matsuri help with the process, and he is grateful to them, for it's due to all of their combined efforts that the sand wielder can get back to the same rank of power that he was at before.

One day, he will assist them in return.

Theme #20 – Love

It takes a while, but he slowly begins to trust his siblings, and together, they are a strong enough unit to support each other and sustain one another, just the three of them.

The presence of their familial love feels comforting and soothing… but in all honesty, it's not enough. He knows there's something more to the subject of love… something that he doesn't quite understand yet. But he is aware of the fact that a portion of his heart still feels empty.

With every piece of the puzzle he uncovers, there always seems to be more that suddenly appear.

**The End**

**Author's Note:** Ah, here is my first try at attempting the 20 truths format! And I know there's no requirement for themes, but I needed some kind of prompt to make these easier to complete, rather than trying to pull up random facts about Gaara out of my butt, heh, heh. Oh, and I don't usually write in the present tense, so I deeply apologize if I made any mistakes with that. (Honestly, I have no idea why I decided to go with present tense for this one when I'm so accustomed to using past tense… I must be getting weird.) I tried to put these in chronological order to the best of my ability, but please feel free to ask if there is any confusion on the timeline.

Of course, I'd love to hear your feedback, so please leave a review and let me know what you thought of these 20 facts on Gaara!

**With love for my fans,**

**Tiger5913**


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